he shaved USA in his pubs
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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