You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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