I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Randomize