I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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