just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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