You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
