There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.