Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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