At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
We had sex on a dog bed..
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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