it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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