whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
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