I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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