found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize