hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
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He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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