Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time