the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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