i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
PANTIES FOUND
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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