and she was petting her beer can
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize