I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
