Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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