the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize