so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
