rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.