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Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
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