My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
