I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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