the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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