I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Dear god my vagina.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize