Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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