at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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