Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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