Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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