people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize