omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
