we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize