It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
When did angry sex become our thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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