It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
