I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Randomize