hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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