I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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