you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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