GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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