Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize