this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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