maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
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Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
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We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.