whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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