Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
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drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
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in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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