I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I CAN MOONWALK!
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
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