I'm really into asian looking animals
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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