Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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